I am Desirée van Nieuwenhoven, mother of two stillborn beautiful babies. My sons were given the names Tom and Tim at birth. My children died because the pregnancy disease HELLP presented itself early. Losing Tom and Tim has been life-changing for me. It has given me many insights to look at the world with a different view.
My mission is to make the impossible possible: to break the taboo on the often self-imposed silence surrounding stillbirth.
desire to have children
I’ve always wanted children. I thought it would be wonderful to have a family and to discover the world with my children. After the stillbirth of my sons Tom (2006) and Tim (2007), however, I had to give a different interpretation to my life. The road to becoming truly happy again went through trial and error. By nature I am creative, practical and have a positive attitude towards life. I experience problems that I encounter as challenges. That was back when Tom and Tim just were deceased, more than quite a challenge.
I like to travel and want to discover the world. They give me energy and inspiration in many areas. I can enjoy the beautiful nature, the culture and I also love to discover the culinary habits in the various countries. Besides travelling, cooking is one of my favorite hobbies.
When the HELLP syndrome showed itself during the second and third pregnancies, I was completely overwhelmed and in shock. I never realized that pregnancy can make you so sick. It felt like I had landed in hell. Pregnancy should be a beautiful experience after all. Losing my children has done a lot to me. Physically, but especially emotionally. I no longer take life, and everything that happens in it, for granted. It has taught me to appreciate my life more. Despite the sadness and loss, my life has succeeded. I am truly happy again. The road to get here was intense and long.
By no longer running away from my sadness, I was able to turn it into love and strength. I feel that Tom and Tim are forever in my heart and will be with me. They give me strength and love, which I now gratefully use to help you process the loss of your child(s) and build a new, happy life.
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